In any family, it can be a balancing act to make sure that everyone's needs are met. For families of individuals with special needs, that can be even tougher. Just making sure everyone is on time for school takes a lot of effort and ensuring that the emotional needs of your kiddos can be even harder.
Try to treat everyone fairly
It's incredibly important to try to treat all your children fairly. We're not saying that you should treat all your children the same, because that's almost impossible. Every kid's needs vary.
Treating every kiddo fairly can be done by ensuring that the consequences of your child faces for their actions - either good or bad - have relatively equal weight.
Ensuring that each of your children gets the proper discipline and avenues for success based on their individual needs is the best way to treat all your kiddos fairly.
Listen and validate
Asking your neurotypical kiddo about the ins and outs of their day and simply listening can be world-changing. Validating their thoughts, opinions, emotions, and experiences can help encourage their individuality.
Schedule out one-on-one time
In addition, schedule out one-on-one time for each of your kiddos. When one of your children requires a bit more care and attention than the other, some of that attention can become unequally balanced. Take time to just hang out with your kiddos, even if that means just going to McDonald's for some soft serve once every so often.
Be honest
If your child has questions about their sibling's diagnosis, answer the questions as honestly as possible. Don't use fancy words, don't sugarcoat it, just be upfront and honest in a manner that is constructive.
Sometimes it can be tough for young kids to understand big things, but after a period of time, they will. If their sibling has Autism and your kiddo is wondering why they're not outwardly affectionate, be honest. Let them know that their sibling loves them but expresses their love a bit differently.
Find common ground for both of your kiddos
Find an activity that both of your kids like to do together and allow them ample time to do that together. Giving your kiddos the space they need to build a good relationship together is a great way to encourage them both to shine.
Diversify their activities
Ensure that both of your children can participate in some of the extracurriculars that interest them. Whether it's having friends over, soccer, rugby, or ballet class, it's a great way to make sure that both your kiddos, whether they're neurotypical or special needs, have a sense of independence and individuality.
Going Forward
Parenting is tough. It's a long day's work. These ideas might work for some, but they might not work for all. Keep in mind, as well, that the progress of ensuring that both of your kiddos have the attention that they need is not going to happen all at once.
